


What did I do to make you love me?

by Itsasparkofgoldandscarletjoy



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Awkwardness, Confusion, Kissing, M/M, Resolved Sexual Tension, Sexual Frustration, more kissing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-05
Updated: 2014-07-05
Packaged: 2018-02-07 14:18:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1902204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Itsasparkofgoldandscarletjoy/pseuds/Itsasparkofgoldandscarletjoy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens when Draco starts acting strange? Harry has no idea what to do anymore..</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. How it all started

**Author's Note:**

> This is a three piece work. The pieces can be read seperately if you want!

The soft late summer air was running through his hair when Harry pushed himself off of the ground. It wasn’t long until he was floating in the air at the same height as the hoops. Finally he could just clear his mind without thinking about anything or anyone sneaking up on him. The thoughts inside his head had been getting weirder and weirder lately. Most of his dreams involved the same thoughts, which was frightening, because Harry sometimes spoke in his sleep and if Ron heard.. Oh god.. That was really not something he was looking forward to.

Harry wasn't in the air for more than ten minutes and there it was. A drop of water fell on his nose. It was cold compared to the warm breeze. Harry tried to ignore it, tried to think about the things he had to think about. The things that he needed sorted out in his head. Draco. The stares during breakfast, during classes, during lunch breaks. The double-checks when he crossed him in the hallways. The way Draco's eyes shot back to his books whenever Harry caught him staring. It was so weird.

The rain was getting more and more difficult to ignore. His Quidditch robes were soaked. He could feel the cold dripping through his shirt, making it stick to his chest. He didn't want to get sick, but he didn't wanted to go back to the castle either and face, I dunno, Ron, Hermione.. Draco..  
  
Harry kept flying circles that weren't even looking like they were meant for practice. Flash! Boom! He curled into his broom instantly, shocked with the sudden sound. He had to get down. It was too dangerous. Flying with lightning wasn't one of the things Harry had good memories of. He shot down, not really seeing well through his water stained glasses. When his feet reached the ground he had no idea how fast he could get inside of the changing rooms. It was too freakin’ cold out here.

Not even with his right foot inside, he threw his broom and robes aside and pulled his shirt over his head. And then, out of nowhere, there were hands. On his chest. Pushing him against the lockers. He couldn't see anything. His glasses were fogged up because the sudden change of temperature.

“Shit.” The person in front of him hissed. It took Harry so off guard that he almost felt his knees give up on him. Draco. Harry wanted to say something, push him off, kick him, anything, but he was locked in place. Draco was just a few inches taller than him, not enough to really have a step forward on him, but now it caused Harry to freeze, feel terrified, but the warmth of Draco's body against his bare skin was frighteningly pleasant. “Shit.” The boy hissed again, and though Harry couldn't see, he felt that Draco's face was closer. He felt the brush of shaky air hit his lips. Harry held his breath, not sure if to do anything. 

He had no idea what was going on. Just a few minutes ago he had just been thinking about what had happened with Draco to make him act the way he did lately, and now he was trapped between a god damn locker and the Slytherin in question. He had nowhere to go, and for a unknown reason, he didn't want to go anywhere. Though the whole thing scared the hell out of him, he felt.. safe. Or something..

Draco's hands were still hovering above his chest, giving Harry a sort of warm glow from the inside. He had no idea where it came from, or what it should tell him, but it was there. Too strong not to notice. At once his lungs sucked in so much air he almost lost his balance. He had totally forgotten to breath properly. It reminded him of his own ability to speak and tried to find the right words inside his head. “Why-” Draco didn't let him finish. The lips that had always been there to insult him, his friends, his parents. The lips that insulted Gryffindor and everyone in it. The lips that called Hermione a mudblood once, that called Hagrid a murderer, Dumbledore a fraud. The lips that were always surrounded by that self-involved smirk. How could those lips feel so caring around his? How could they make him feel so complete?

Draco pushed himself off as fast as everything started, looking confused. He backed off shakily. Harry looked at him. He could finally see him through his glasses, searching for something in those silvery green eyes. Harry had no idea what was going on in Draco's mind, or in his own, but all he knew was that he wanted. More, less, he didn't care, he just wanted it so bad.

His hands grabbed for Draco's Quidditch robes, pulling him back while stepping forwards himself. Lips clashed hastily. The whole room felt like it was on fire. Shit. What the hell was happening?! This couldn't be right, could it? But neither of them stopped. They just got closer. Harry could feel Draco's heartbeat increase. He couldn't think anymore. His mind was taken over by this hazy cloud of want and all he could do was press his mouth closer to Draco, press his body closer. They almost tumbled down over the bench that had been there for years, but Draco could hold himself up just in time. It caused them to pause for a second, find each other’s eyes. Draco just sat down on the wooden bench, making a gesture for Harry to come closer.

His breath hitched when he saw the look of pure want in Draco's eyes and he didn't take another second to change his mind. Carefully, he placed his knees on both sides of Draco's thighs, practically straddling his lap. He looked down at Draco from his new found position, smirking a bit, liking the dominance. “You're hot.” Draco whispered almost inaudible. And lips were together again.


	2. We need to talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the downright weird incident on the quidditch pitch a few days ago, Draco and Harry need to talk.

Oh holy mother of Merlin! What was he doing here?! He shouldn’t..! “Hey Potter!” Oh shit. “Yes.. What do you want?” Harry responded, trying to sound annoyed. He turned around and locked his eyes with Draco. “Oh, nothing. Just bothering you.” The smirk on his face told Harry everything. He wanted to get out of here. Now. He needed to. The boy across the hallway was staring at him too intensely. It was unbearable.  And then there was this whole fact that Hermione and Ron were at his side, forcing him to act as if he hated Draco, when he actually wanted to.. _Get that thought out of your head, Potter!_ He didn’t hate him, but they didn’t know, or needed to know. “Okay, next time if you ‘just’ come to bother me, make sure you-” He didn’t get to say anything else. Draco already turned the corner with a far too adorable smile. It was confusing.

“Oookay.. What the hell was that about?” Ron broke the silence. Harry shook his head a little before turning to Ron. “Uhm.. I seriously have no idea..” He lied. Of course he knew what it was about. It was about last week, when Draco had run into Harry in the changing rooms on the Quidditch pitch. Harry tried to force the memory out of his head before he started to blush. “I-I need to go. See you later, guys.” Harry almost literally run off. Leaving Ron and Hermione behind. Both of them sharing looks of confusion.

\--

“Draco.. I need to talk to you.. No, that sounds way too serious. Uhmm..” Harry closed his eyes and started again. “Draco. The other day. This afternoon.. What is this all about?” Harry sighed and let himself slide down the cold stone wall of one of the deserted classrooms in the dungeons. This was useless. How could he ever confront Draco when everything he tried to say didn’t even come out of his mouth properly. “Draco, why do you have to be such a..”

“Such a what?” Shit! “Uhm.. Nothing.” He tried but he couldn’t talk himself out of this. Draco was standing in the doorway, being his awesome self, as always. He heard what he had said. Harry sighed. “I dunno.. It’s just.” “Do you regret it?” Draco dropped. What?! Instantly Harry felt really small, sitting on the floor, with Draco looking down on him. “Uhm.. No, I don’t think so. It’s just. I think I.. uhm.. I th-think I-I liked it or something.. And it’s just weird because I’m supposed to hate you, and you’re a guy and..” This was going totally wrong. Could he just hit himself now?  “You.. you liked it..?” Draco was sitting down next to him. Harry felt his cheeks warming up. “Uhm. Yes. That’s what I said.” He was purposefully trying to avoid Draco’s eyes. Focusing on every tiny little thing in the classroom.

Draco was silent for a little bit too long. It scared Harry. It made him feel as if he had screwed everything up by admitting what he had been suppressing the past few days. He bit his lip, a bit too hard, which caused a tear to sting in the corner of his eye. “Wait, Harry.” Draco never called him that. It was always ‘Potter’, said in that sneering way that made Harry’s chest hurt. But now it was different. His voice was caring, like nothing he’d ever heard. “Are you crying? Please.. stop. You can’t..” Draco’s hands were suddenly warm on his. Harry tried to force his eyes shut. He tried to keep himself from drowning in Draco’s. “I’m not crying.” He said roughly, but the tear fell down his cheek anyway. “I just bit my lip too hard.”

A brush of fingers against his cheek. It made him shiver. “Can I..?” Draco said unsure, biting his own lip this time. Harry looked at him and saw Draco’s gaze cross his lips for a split second. Harry gulped. He didn’t trust his voice, so he just nodded. Way too fast, way too certain. Draco tilted his head down a little and captured Harry’s lips with his own carefully. He didn’t move and Harry was starting to freak out. What if someone walked in on them? What if- Draco interrupted his thoughts by pushing at his shoulder so he could look in his eyes. “It’s okay, alright? You can.. If you want to..” He was also blushing. “Yeah.. Okay..” Harry sighed out, more to himself that to anyone else, and placed his hands over Draco’s shoulders, pulling him closer, back to his lips.

It was weird. Just doing this. Just kissing with the boy he had pretended to hate for more than four years. They hadn’t even talked about anything yet. It was so frustrating. The feelings, everything. But on the contrary, he had never felt more complete. The feeling of how easily they fitted together. The way Draco made his heart pound whenever he only looked at him. Harry was lost in thought until he heard voices from the hallway and pushed them apart as fast as he could, running the sleeve of his jumper across his mouth. “I’m sorry. I kinda.. freaked out, I guess.” Looking down at his knees as he felt Draco shuffle closer to him. “I understand.” He just replied, like there wasn’t a thing they had to worry about.

“What are we even doing?” Harry asked a lot more frustrated than his original intention was. “I mean, one day we just hate each other, everything’s easy, and the next day you start giving me those looks and then you just kiss me out of the blue. It isn’t right. It isn’t-” “Shh.” Draco broke him off. “We don’t need to talk.” He leaned in again but before he could reach Harry’s lips, Harry pushed him away. “Yes we do, Draco! We do have to talk! This isn’t something we can just _go_ with. It isn’t as if no one will wonder if you and I, I dunno, showed up at the library together. Or walking to classes. I mean. This-” He gestured between both of them. “-This isn’t how it’s supposed to be, you know.” Harry held his breath when he saw the hurt look in Draco’s eyes. “W-ait. I didn’t mean.. Shit. I don’t know what I mean.”

He took a moment to start over. “Draco, listen. We have to talk, okay. It’s not that I don’t want this, it’s just that I want things clear or something. I think.” His voice got quiet at the end. He looked in the other boy’s eyes and gulped before he took his hand. He could do this. “What is it you feel for me?” There it was. Just that simple question, the thing that had been wandering around his head whole week.

“I-I..” Draco tried. “I dunno.. It’s just.. Whenever I see you I have this urge to kiss you and run my hands all over you.” Immediately after he blurted it out, he covered his mouth with his hands. “That wasn’t supposed to leave my mouth.” He mumbled quietly. Harry stayed still for a moment. Trying to gather what was happening. “I’ve been trying to fight these urges for two years now, you know.” Draco continued to explain. “And then you were just there. All alone, no one to disturb us. At the Quidditch pitch, I mean. I couldn’t..” _Two years?_ His mind was struck. He could have had all of this two years ago?

His hands found Draco’s chest immediately, pushing him to the ground. His mouth catching his lips hastily. God, why did this feel so good? “Shit, Harry.” Draco said breathless when they broke the kiss. “I thought you were the one that wanted to talk.” The loving smile on his face was unmistakably. “Well.. Never mind. I think I’ll understand sooner or later.” Kissing him again. He could do this every minute.

“Draco!?” a voice rumbled from the corridor. SHIT! Harry got up so hastily he almost knocked over a table. “What the hell are we supposed to do?” He asked whispering, looking around nervously, smoothing his robe. “I dunno.” Draco hissed back. “Draco! Where are you?” Goyle’s voice sounded even more bouldering with the echo from the dungeons. “I’ll see you later, Potter.” Draco turned around and left without saying another word. “Draco! There you are. Can you help me with my potions homework?” “Sure..” Harry could hear them walk away, but was too scared to get out of the classroom for another five minutes.

The cold wall kept reminding him of how warm Draco had felt against him. “Shit..” He really had to think about something else. Before everyone would notice. Self-conscious, Harry got up. He felt how on edge his nerves were. But at least he left the room that would keep putting images in his head.


	3. Living a lie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A scene that takes place a non-determined time after the frankly awkward conversation.

“Harry! Seriously! What the hell is wrong with you!?” Ron threw a pencil to his head. “Nothing! And stop throwing things at me!” They had been doing homework in the library for ages. And for some unfortunate reason, Draco was there too. “I’m serious..” Ron whispered while sitting closer. “.. It just isn’t possible that I made more homework that you in the past two hours.” Okay, not ages then, but it was a long time, especially when you couldn’t stare at your boyfriend without anyone noticing. No one was allowed to notice. It was sort of awkward. Nobody knew. Not even Ron. He couldn’t tell him. It was just-

“Hello…?” Ron’s hand was waving in front of his face. “Anyone home? Uhg.. You’re awful. I finally see what Hermione was getting at when she picked on me for not paying attention.” Harry shook his head a little. “I’m sorry.. What did you ask?” He tried playing dumb. Wouldn’t work of course, Ron knew him better than that. “I’m just saying, Harry. It isn’t really you to be so.. I dunno.. unfocussed. You used to be the one telling _me_ to work.” “I’m sorry Ron, but..” He stopped, he didn’t want to explain. How could he possibly say ‘Well, my boyfriend is sitting over there and he’s glancing at me with those eyes and I really need to go to the bathroom now.’ No, exactly! He just couldn’t!

“But..?” Shit. “I dunno..” He glanced over at Draco anyway, his eyes didn’t do what his mind told them to. “I’m just distracted, I think.” His gaze fell back on his piece of empty parchment, but Ron looked around to where Harry had just been staring. “Distracted?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. Harry just fixed his eyes on his parchment even more, though there was nothing on it. He didn’t respond, hoping Ron would just drop it and go back to studying. He did.

“Hey! What was that for?” Harry almost shouted when he felt something hit his head a little while later, thinking it was Ron again. “What the hell, dude..? I didn’t do anything.” “Oh.. Sorry, then.” He looked around, trying to find the culprit. And then he saw Draco smirking at him. His eyes almost pointing at the edge of the table, at the wad of paper laying there. As fast and unnoticeable as he could, Harry grabbed it and folded it open under the table. The words made Harry’s breath hitch. Shit. This was totally not making things easier.

It was possible his cheeks burned and everyone in the library could see or even feel the heath radiating from them but he didn’t even give a shit and stood up. “Ron, I’m going to the bathroom for a minute, okay?” When he turned his back to the table and left, he heard another chair move, he heard footsteps following him. The tie around his neck suddenly seemed a lot tighter, almost choking him, or that is what it felt like.

“Hey Malfoy, you’d better leave Harry alone.” Harry heard Ron say behind him. _Oh, he’d better not._ “And why would that be any of your business, Weasel?” Draco sneered back. It hurt Harry a little bit to hear his boyfriend call his best friend that way. It reminded him of the fact they had to pretend. They had to pretend everything. Only when they were totally alone they could be the persons they really were.

“Hey Potter.” Draco said with an annoying _pretended_ mock in his voice. “Malfoy.” Harry replied cool. Oh, he would play this game. “What do you want?” The look in the Slytherin’s eyes said everything that couldn’t be said. “What I want? Nothing.” _Everything._ “Okay then.. Leave me alone.” _Come with me._ Harry walked down the hallway to a certain cupboard that had become quite familiar in the past two weeks. “Stop following me, Draco.” _Damn, walk faster, idiot._ “You really want that?” The humorous tone was almost annoying. Just a look over his shoulder was enough. _No._ Draco hurried. And within seconds they were inside the cupboards, surrounded by brooms, buckets and mops.

Their eyes had softened. Arms were laid around each other’s bodies. “I’ve missed you.” They mumbled at the same time. Laugher. It was funny, sometimes, how well they were in sync with the other. The beautiful serenity of the moment only lasted a few seconds, though. Teenage hormones were interfering. Draco let his hand slip past the rim of Harry’s shirt. It still tickled though the feeling wasn’t quite unfamiliar or unpleasant. But still..

“You’re a monster, you know that?” Harry pushed at Draco’s chest, trying to go for serious but ending up with a smile on his face evidently. “Is that so?” Draco responded with a cocky smile. “ _Stop licking at that quill, you have much better things to do with your tongue right now?_ Seriously Draco?” The smug smile on Draco’s face didn’t disappear when Harry waved the piece of paper in front of his face, it only caused him to smile wider. “I was serious, though. You _could_ do much better things with that tongue.” “Don’t you mean ‘you _should_ ’?” Harry asked back in the same playful tone Draco was talking in. “Well.. If you insist..” Draco’s eyes flicked to Harry’s lips with a kind of dark, heated look, making him look like a total bad-ass, but the blush on his face told Harry other things. Draco was still nervous about all of this.

Harry let his lips brush softly over Draco’s, more teasing than actually kissing him. Only when he felt Draco shiver a little bit, he caught his lower lip between his mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it, guys! I hope you enjoyed it! :)


End file.
